Yesterday I came home early and was just loitering around in the house when:
Mum: Your night suit looks good (It was daytime, but you know I wear night suit all the time)
Me: Mum!!! You’ve seen me wearing this dress earlier.
Mum: Yeah kid, but I’ve never noticed it since I’m seeing you in day light after a long time
(wah Mum.. what a taunt!!...)
Oh by the way I logged in here, just to bookmark some of my favorite one liners and quotes. I find these cute and want them to be here.. I will keep adding new-fangled ones:
P.S: You can find some more Sarcastic and Funny One Liner Collection .>>Here<<
Some of my favorite One liners:
- Everybody needs something to believe. I believe I'll have another cup of coffee!
- A chill in the air, a cat on the lap, a mug of chocolate, and a good book. Ah, Paradise!
- Oh I am just an ordinary girl who loves garlic bread, bread with garlic on it.
- I was reading the dictionary; I thought it was a poem about everything.
- I have an answering machine in my car. It says: I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.
- If you believe you can tell me what to think, I believe I can tell you where to go.
- Why get real? Plastic is cheaper, It doesn't rot, It comes in prettier colors, and it's much easier to clean!
- She's a rebel, She's a rebel, She's a rebel, and she's dangerous!!!!
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- Your so boring, if you threw a boomerang, it wouldn't come back to you!
- By the time I realized my parents were right, I had kids that didn't believe me. (bwhhahah)
- Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.
- Include me out.
- I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die (Me: I know its like against me and all females , but its kinda cute!)
- Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain
- After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles." (Meaning: I cant speak English)
- Whatever it is -- I didn't do it!
- This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door.
- I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
- I wouldn't say you're stupid. You are, but I wouldn't say it.
- "You know what they say, what doesn't kill you..." 'Leaves you maimed, depressed and with and incredibly large debt to the hospital?'
- Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.
- Sometimes I just sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits
- I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
- You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
- Basic research is what I’m doing, when I don’t know what I’m doing.
Oh and I’ll keep you updated if I change my job , cuz every single day I think that I want to change my job.. Lets see what comes about.. Yeah m hell befuddled! :D
Tanzy is so weird that no body would want to fritter their existence with her.. So this one will suit me well..
“A chill in the air, a
*Chick: Young one of a hen. Incase you dirty minds think otherwise :p
I promise to upload some pictures of my desk at work. :D