the cook inside me

Would u believe me ?? if?? I ?? told? Ye dat I cook??... (okay so I can cook.. believe it or not.. ) I can cook a lotta things like I can boil water, n I can put vegetables/noodles/ur head/ or anything u want, in dat boiling water, n I can cook eggs(variety of egg dishes :D), roll chapattis( okay now I hate to do dat, I never do that, I dun know, its like a year now, n I was feeling dunno why, very much domestic n asked my mum if I could help her wid the chapattis n all,

so I know how to roll them bt I never use my art of rolling chapattis anymore, I think I must have forgotten the art :o, hehe I m really duty-bound to tell you that once upon a time my “mamijaan” ok dats wot u call 2 your moms brothers wife, aka maternal aunt ..if I am right, so my maternal aunt visited my home during this “domestic-tanzy” phase.. hehe :p.. n she saw dat I was helping mum with the chapatti thing, n now the word is spread in my kinfolk that I m a good gurl.. ha ha..

its weird u kno .. ha ha .. n every one in my clan thinks dat I m a good gurl(perhaps I am! :o :p) n they like me a lot heheh.. again a funny thing.. I think they dun know me :p)

Arrgh!!

Got off d track again.. so back to praising about my catering skills.. :D

I can make tea/coffee/black tea( without milk)/black coffee (without milk)/tea (without tea)/coffee (without coffee)/any variety of tea n coffee, u name it I can make it… :D

I now know how to bake a cake, ahem! A diff cake without icing n all, but it tastes well :p

When I was I think in 8th or 9th or dun remember which grade, I used to make Chinese rice, ha ha,, u know how :D..?? (I dun like rice a lot, I mean dal chawal(yep but u know, on special occasions our people prepare this “special-occasion-dal-chawal” which I worship, which is prepared in a huge cooking pot.. yumm!!)……

So rice right??

I juz cant gobble it, and hence I used to take those rice from the dal-chawal n then heat up a pan, pour oil in it, put certain vegges n sauces n blah in it, n tadaa! Chinese rice is ready to chomp! (at least I thought it tasted like Chinese rice )but unfortunately, I no-more prepare that rice from that dal chawal rice

While writing all this, an equation flooded in my brain :D, its pretty interesting…

See :D

Dal chawal rice (one part of dal n two part of chawal aka rice, as chawal n rice means the same thing) – (less) dal chawal (so one part of rice remains) +(add) pan + oil + sauces + vegges + blah *(multiply wid) hong ching san (okay that had to be added or how would it be chineese??) = (equals) Chinese rice :D aint it :D ??

Ahh! Now where was I??

Sad about Chinese rice.. ya I dunno bt I just plumb not make it anymore.. no reasons, nothings, just like that.. sad..

My catering achievements are yet to be filled in, but u know,.. I have always wished that I could prepare so many tasty tasty deliciously tasty food thingies.. u know like “biryani”, this is #1 in my list, I don't know?? Chicken gravy sorta n things like that :D… ( oii !! wake up! Good morning,, I said “wished”.. im too bored to tears to learn all these things right now.. possibly some other time of next year or the year after next year!

okay so this story has to be said at this juncture, as we are talking about “biryaani”, one fine day I asked my mum to aquaint me with the recipe of “biryani” okay so I made a move! :p and she started to dictate me the recipe, n yawn.. I was jotting the whole thing down

Four reasons why I gave up on jotting down recipes (or can I say recipe?? Cuz it was d first try ):

1. Now one thing, my mum isn’t good with dictating recipes, my new cookbook was looking like a page crowded with cancelled words, n doodles

2. My mum was also bored (I assumed)

3. My mum was more engrossed in watching the afternoon soap operas(which I hate.. I hate it like anything, like a non-vegetarian hates vegg food, or vice versa, like a child hates homework(bad example), like a watchman loves sleeping and we hate it etc etc) she wanted to peacefully watch her soap-shows, n was mentally signalling me to ask her that “mum can we do this thing, some time later?”

4. I was getting bored, and my mums signals were so strong, that I had to ask her, I wanted to ask her, so I asked her, and then I went back on doing productive things like sleeping! N she was happy watching her TV

Now one or two months have passed since, this cookbook episode, once my mum jogged my memory that I wanted to learn 2 cook “biryani” , I did act as I din hear what she said, n now I act as I have forgotten the whole episode, and never mention it to her..Ahh!!.I need no more of this cookbook thingy

Okay here I go again..

So actually I barked a bit about my catering skills today, I guess. The raison d’etre behind this is that it is the same day when I cooked macaroni (one sensible dish I know to prepare is this, and it aint the first time I prepared this… )and good news folks!! The dish was totally NON POISONOUs!! (okay now I am still alive and typing in this diary, so the macaroni has to be non poisonous, almost certainly!! Cuz if I hear this somewhere that some poisons work little by little n it takes like 8-9 hours to show symptoms or sumthin.. so incase I dun post tomorrow, you now are familiar with the reason why!!

.. okay and the recipe of this macaroni is my own(a big hug to myself, I am at times productive!)

I was thinking ..why I never na med my dish?? Why??

I suggest u should name ur dish, after all its ur dish, u prepared it, its ur recipe.?? So I came up with the name Trojan tomato macaroni…in view of the fact that I m still awestruck by the Trojan tomato, and this macaroni had tomatoes in it , n its red in color(the color of tomato is also red : for those who dun know) so I think Trojan tomato macaroni seems to be a quite apposite name..

but the only problem with this name is that , IT IS HELL TOO LONG NAME..!! I mean name of a recipe should be petite, (always keep in mind that, people who prepare this dish after u, after tasting this scrumptious dish, they wont like to call the dish with such a lengthened name, and probably give a new name to it, grrr … that would definitely make my blood boil ) so I m thinking of a shorter name,.. :o n I aint able to come up with a shorter name.. cuz I m so much into the name Trojan tomato macaroni…. That my heart n my brain at the same time rejects to give another name…. so no more name changing discussion.. its decided!!. this dish is going to be labelled as TROJAN TOMATO MACRONI.. !!

three words of advise to those who want to cook my recipie:

1. Whoever wants to prepare this dish would have to call it with its full name, no nick names tolerable!!

2. No one will ever call it a tomato macaroni. Cuz seriously people?? Thats like a slap in my face, its like total insult of my catering skills!! I squander half an hour in a kitchen, cookin this fab dish, n all u call it is plain tomato macaroni?? that aint fair..

3. Don’t ever try to call it, as a TROTO or TROT macaroni,,(ahem! This seems to be quite a sensible name after all, take “TRO” from Trojan n “TO” from tomato ) but no .. I like the full name :x

Okay now this is for those people who likes to break the rules: as I m one with the upper hand(the great great creator of the recipe) u need to abide by the rules or else face the consequences… yeah! I have prepared a curse, which will be automatically teleported to the breaker-of-the-law, n his/her Trojan tomato macaroni will be converted into a pumpkin :D

Ahh !! so cooking the trot macaroni :D , while I was preparing the macaroni..Now I have this thing with me, I don’t like anyone scuttling around, while I cook,, I mean leave me alone! ( I dun like people(mum)telling me that I did something wrong, cuz if she isn’t there, I could throw whichever ingredient in the cooking-pot, in any order, and no one will utter a word (as no one would be around . ha ha)) so I chivvied mom away from the kitchen(ha ha I know she got irked)

u know.. why I baked this trot macaroni?? I guess u don’t

seven reasons, reasoning the reason why I cooked the trot macaroni: (okay I know this line aint grammatically correct, but I ask which line is? ? in this journal??)

1. My mum cant cook macaroni well( I dun know why, she by no means cooks it, whenever it comes to cooking macaroni, its me! Who has to cook )

2. Just for a change n see the “domestic-me” once more(okay I admit, this week I have been too much of domestic. enough of this domestic crap now! I aint getting married and I seriously have no plans to take housekeeping as a career)

3. My mum likes the trot macaroni :o

4. My brother, who I can never imagine in my freakiest dreams, that he! could ever have this macaroni :o, surprisingly he likes it nowadays

5. I like to wear that red apron

6. And last night I had this weird dream where I was this macaroni queen, n my country men aka macronies were pleading me, to cook them, so I had 2 cook u see :p

7. I am in love…. I love the macaroni and I am getting this uncharacteristic feeling the macaroni loves me too (people! U are invited to the grand unison of two souls Mr. macaroni n Miss tanzy.. :D.. Location: at my dining table, time : dinner time) :D

After the trot got prepared.. it was steaming in the cooking pot, I cover the pot with a lid(GOD knows from where, a lil spidy can come just to checkout, that what is this delightfully flavorsome smell thing is, n perhaps that spidy wants to taste my trot macroni!! And in an attempt to taste my macaroni he can jump into the cooking pot n now because of the temperature and the stem, I think u all can make out that a lil creature like a miserable spidy can never in his life, come out of the pot, hence his death body will lie there .. See ?? not only humans but the lil creatures like my dish but that is a different thing that because of this now-newly dead spidy, our so non-poisonous macaroni is now converted into POISONOUS!!)ok so I cover the pot(I love my life, don’t want to die cuz of a lil spidy), and take the pot to the dining table

Dining table scene: mum is sitting on the couch watching news (she’s free today, as I cooked the feast, okay I cooked but she did aid me by slicing all the vegetables n blah things in advance (okay mum, that was so sweet of u, but I could slice veges, but since u have sliced them for me, I LOVE U MUM!!)see I wasn’t lazy but mum did it for me, not my fault :D :p is it??

Dining table scene (again): mom on couch - news ,my bro as usual playing game on pc(I really want to tell u abt his stupid dining table routine.. but no! I wont.. possibly some time later..cuz if I start I would completely go off the track in a sense that I wont come back to the topic) n I am alone on the dining table.. ok so the pc the TV and the couch n the dining table are in the same place.. so u can understand :p.. bt still on the dining table I am alone, and I take my favorite bowl, pour (ha-ha pour :p u dork.. u cant pour a dry macaroni :x) okay so I transferred the macaroni from the cooking pot to my favorite bowl, and I view that my Trojan tomato macaroni (I think its important for me to call it , with its full name, or elz my followers will also call it by “those” names, I have a responsibility, I have to live my life in a way that my followers are not misguided, ok missy tanzy panzy… now its time to shut your mouth, or you’ll be sued for saying making stories about your followers!) so this macaroni does not look really beautiful or decorative... Its passable.. anyone can think they are prawns n not Macaroni..

and I feel I need to add a lil greenery to the dish so I make an endeavor to ornament the thing with 3 leaves of coriander(actually I wanted to decorate it with mint leaves, bt I couldn’t find the mint in the refrigerator n I m kinda scared of my mum, she could scold me and ask me javascript:void(0)
Publish Postto eat my meal :o so I secretly ornamented my bowl of macs with 3 leaves coriander)

So now if u have a house party or even a grand biggy big party at your place u know, you can anytime call, you-know-who

Yea dats right :D, I love to go to free parties where they serve free food :D